Oh my glob, what a wild start to June! The past few weeks have been pretty intense to say the least. It all started with a small leak in my apartment, the realization I haven’t had a good, cleansing cry in a while, another leak, getting sick, and yet another leak! Ugh! What the eff is going on?!
After visioning a very colorful body scan in the Wisdom Within School, I wanted to take a closer look at the lightning bolts that apparently inhabit my Root Chakra. I’m really happy I did this too because I have more healing that needs to be done than I originally thought. *nervous laughter* It’s about to get personal…
What is the current state of your Root Chakra: Three of Swords
Surprise! But not really. I have to be honest – my foundation has been very Tower energy lately. I was kind of surprised that this wasn’t the Tower but the Three of Swords makes 100000000000% sense. The apartment is in disarray. We had an HVAC leak that soaked through the carpet. That was the second time it happened in a year! The maintenance guy was nice enough to come by and fix it and he called out the carpet dude to put blowers out to dry out the carpet so he could replace the padding and yadda yadda. Then the Friday of Memorial Day weekend, I came home to a huge puddle of water in the hallway. Initially I thought it was our water heater that was leaking but upon further investigation, it turned out that our upstairs neighbors had moved out and when they unhooked their washing machine, they didn’t shut the water off all the way, so it had been slowly leaking into our apartment ALL. DAMN. DAY. The maintenance guy sounded annoyed that I had called him at 7pm on the Friday of a 3-day weekend but I was like “I’m not going to be sitting in puddles of water all night!” He shut off the water upstairs but didn’t bring a wetvac or anything. He just told us to put towels down and that he’d call the carpet guy out the next day. The next day!! WTF?!
Long story short – the carpet guy came out and was like “Bruh, I just saw you guys! Lemme dry this up for you” and then the HVAC unit was leaking again (!!!!) and then I got horribly sick with an upper respiratory infection all by Monday night. Ugh!!! Needless to say, I was definitely shook and I had to have my boyfriend fight the fight while I was recovering.
While I was home sick with these infernal industrial fans blowing, I was thinking about my foundation and how it has been a little unstable. It seems I haven’t been able to steady it ever since I had the pleasure of clearing out my childhood home 2 years ago. Yes, I’m still hung up on that and yes, I’m still cord cutting/dissolving from it but we’ve got a ways to go on that and I think this card is the big punctuation mark on that.
What do you need to do in order to have a firm foundation in your life: The High Priestess
Okay, this card has been showing up for me a lot. Like, a lot a lot. So much so that I think enrolling in the Wisdom Within School happened at the right time. My connection to my spiritual Self has been slowly disconnecting since the beginning of this year. I know that part of it has to do with my second job as a social media content creator. I’m on different kinds of social media all day, every day, looking for inspiration and seeing what’s going on in pop culture, which is something I had gotten away from when I started my spiritual journey a few years ago. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy my job but I’m so drained. I work one job in the morning and the social media job the rest of the day and by the time I get home, I’m exhausted. My intuitive Self is feeling neglected BUT I’m glad that she knows I’m taking the necessary steps to reconnect with her.
What limits and boundaries do you need to create: Six of Wands
I was confused by this for a moment but a message came through very clearly: “Don’t be afraid to be seen or heard”. That might sound counterintuitive with this victorious card as a limit and boundary but it makes sense. I’m always afraid to put myself out there and this feels like it’s saying, “Katzi, please stop being afraid of putting yourself out there!! You won’t know unless you try. What are your boundaries if you don’t ever really do anything?” I was thinking about this really hard while listening to Kelly-Ann Maddox’s most recent video about the Inner Child. I had been thinking about all of the Inner Child healing that still needs to be done, especially around my childhood home thing. But another very strong message that came through was, “Don’t let anyone push your limits or your boundaries. Speak. The. Fuck. Up. Where is that fighter? Where is the hothead that wouldn’t take any shit? Bring her back.” Maybe I’ll bring her back (but with less rage).
What needs to be nourished in order for you to know yourself and be balanced: King of Swords
To me, this is kind of reiterating the little firecracker that dwells in me, to a degree. The way his expression is so authoritative is reassuring me that it’s okay for me to speak up, it’s okay for me to have opinions and take up space. This has been an ongoing thing with me that I’ve been working really hard to break out of. I’m so afraid of taking up space even though there’s endless amounts of space. So what if I occupy a little? Other people have no problems taking up lots of space, why can’t I? This will take some getting used to, for sure, but I do have to start. I always keep thinking of those phrases that are like “Why exist when you can live” or something along those lines. I feel like I have little bursts of “living” but long stretches of “existing”. Sounds like something has got to change. I’m working on it!
What will your Root Chakra look like if you heed this advice? Temperance
My old friend Temperance. I have this thing about balance. Of course I do, it’s in all my branding, right? Balancing the scales, balancing anything, for me, is hard. I get intense surges of FOMO and in certain situations, I’m all YOLO but where is the balance? Where is the moderation? It all stems in my Root, my foundations. I always had to eat all of the food on my plate because being wasteful is bad. I always have to sign up because it’s “only for a limited time!!!!!” I always have to “go big or go home”, right? That sounds like the opposite of what I just said for the King of Swords but with me, I’m more on extremes than balance, which isn’t great. Overindulge because you just never know when you’ll have that chance again, don’t say anything because you don’t want to fuck this up…So many contradictions, it can make a little Libra so confused! It’ll make anyone confused! I also have this thing about patience, as in, I don’t have any. I want everything now! I need everything now! I am short tempered and almost annoyingly impatient – and I don’t want to be anymore. Temperance is a card that used to come up a lot for me when I used to share readings with my friend on FB and I see that it’s still stalking me pretty intensely as if to say, “We’re so not done yet, little lady!” Okay, I hear you loud and clear. I want my Root Chakra to be all Temperance‘d out. I want to be patient, I want to finally feel properly balanced. It doesn’t have to be all the time but I’d like to experience that feeling again.
Okay, so that was personal AF but I’m glad I’m putting it out there because, as we know, our words have power and I want to empower myself to make the positive changes in my life. A few things have come in to remind me that life is too short and we need to YOLO it up as much as we can. Thank you for being here ❤ Let’s do this thing together!
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